Sunday, January 15, 2012

My newest fascination: Oranges

At the moment I can't stop eating oranges.
I want to eat them all the time.
Everything about oranges is attractive to me right now.
I even want to dress like oranges.
Orange, orange, orange.
It's Winter Sadness. The oranges break through it. Vitamin C!!!
Winter Sadness, pull me down
Feel the cold within my bones
Alone on the hard ground.
I'm just another young girl
taking advantage of the world,
So bring me peace
Make me numb
Let me go
but fill me up
I want to feel...
The biting chill.
If He won't help me
Winter will.
I just wrote that. It's not as good as I feel it should be.
I guess the point here is: I want to live in a tropical climate, in a shack on a beach. I want to do yoga in the early morning and surf in the afternoon. I've never surfed. I lived near the ocean for a year in second grade. That was the year I lived on the military base in Monterey Bay, California. I want to drink orange juice with a twisty straw and do nothing stressful for days on end. I want to sit and listen to The Head and the Heart with all my walls down. Learn to play the ukulele. I love winter and fall in Idaho- with the trees, the woods, the pine needle baskets, boots, sweaters, knit hats, crochet hats. I love it all. But not right now. Right now, I just want to be warm and free! As much as it annoys me when clothing is labeled "tribal", "ethnic", "bohemian", "Navajo" (<--- that's the most annoying. Not every geo-Native-inspired print is Navajo, dudes), I can't help but like the clothes itself. I'll ignore the names because the print and color is beautiful. I want to dress in these warm things that remind me of the beach and Summer and all things free. I am a free-spirit, I'm just still trying to figure out how to be as free as I want to be without being homeless, jobless, and family-less. I know myself. I'll never be happy if I'm not free. All I want to do is travel and dig in the dirt. I have no delusions that financial success will make me happy. I'm a vagabond! A true bohemian! I've got Romany Gypsy blood and I can't sit still!
But for now, I'll just listen to "Oh Virginia", work on that archaeology/anthropology degree, dream of Summer and all the things I want to do, and shop the clearance sales and thrift stores for more clothes like this stuff. So I'm ready for Summer, of course. I still have Christmas money from my dad to spend.
Speaking of the things I want to do this Summer, here's a list:
Volunteer on an archaeological dig (I can do that!)
Road trip with friends (Canada, Oregon Coast)
Go to the Doe Bay Music Festival
Attend ALL local festivals and fairs
Busk downtown near the lake
Make things with dandelion
Maybe visit my big sister:)
I'll just finish out winter first.
Make more hats
Learn to knit
Do homework (happily! It's anthropology!)
Make baskets
Make homemade tea

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